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Whiskey River Craftworks

Super Bitch

Super Bitch

Regular price $79.00 USD
Regular price Sale price $79.00 USD
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Unapologetically bold and beautifully crafted, this handmade hardwood sign brings humor and attitude to any space. Precision carved from premium hardwood with a smooth finish, it's the perfect statement piece for anyone who doesn't take themselves too seriously. Whether displayed in a home office, bedroom, or living room, this parody sign sparks conversation and laughs. Each piece is individually hand-finished in our shop, making it a one-of-a-kind addition to your decor. A gift that lands with personality. About 13 1/2" x 10 1/4".

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Nope. We use a CNC mill for carving for shape, but all glue-ups, sanding, painting, finishing, and design are done by humans. No lasers, no robots, just elbow grease.

Usually 4-6 weeks for carving and finishing, and 3-5 days in shipping transit. Yes, we know that sounds long. Yes, it's worth it. No, we can't magically teleport it to your door. We work first in first out. Fragrance Items usually ship in 2-3 days.

Yep—orders over $50 get free shipping. Under $50? Sorry, small potatoes still pay for postage.

Yep. Designs, sizes, wood type, or paint color? Just ask. If it doesn't involve a unicorn or time travel, we'll make it happen. Actually, We can do Unicorns too!

Custom orders have a 24-hour grace period. After that… maybe. If we haven't started carving, painting, and finishing yet, we can try. Once we start, it's basically immortal.

Yes. We offer wholesale and bulk orders. While we won't usually carve a thousand tiny "World's Okayest Employee" signs, large enough orders are absolutely welcome. Email us and we'll discuss the details.

Kind of. We vend almost every weekend in the summer from our 1963 TravelEz Camper-turned-boutique. In winter, we haul it inside for shows. Dust, sawdust, and paint smell included.

No. But if there's an issue, reach out—we'll help however our tiny little business can.

Close. Wood is a diva—it moves, has knots, and does dumb stuff. Each piece is one-of-a-kind, signed, dated, and stamped. Colors and size may vary slightly.

Usually listed on the product. Want something different? Ask—we can quote pretty much any size.

Locally sourced hardwood. Species vary, and each one is unique. See #9 for wood diva behavior. Want something specific? Just ask.

They come with attached hangers. Garage, man-cave, cabin, or above your desk—you're in charge. There are some exceptions for our outdoor signs.

Gentle. Not too much water. No magic spells. Basically, don't leave it out in the rain unless we made it to do so.

Yep. Hand-painted, so slight variation is part of the charm. See #15 if you need color matching.

Yes. Email us. If it's possible in the real world, we'll make it happen.